When does it get easier...

My son will start preschool in Sept. and honestly I'm scared for him because he has such a hard time listening to anything or anybody in general! I am not saying i am a bad mother and i am not saying i don't discipline my son because i do, and how much can a 2yr old take...

My son is so hard headed that he wont do anything you ask of him. Now don't get me wrong he is a very good boy and very smart and thats my problem hes to smart for his own good that it gets him into so much trouble!! i just want to know how do i get him to listen and sit down for 5 Min's all i want is 5 Min's of quietness that's all I'm asking for is that to much to ask?? Am i being unreasonable here??

When does this get easier? He will be 3 in August and i just want him to listen to me and pick up his toys and maybe don't for get to flush the toilet when hes done with it!!! I'm beginning to think that i am asking for the imposable...Can someone please answer me, when does it get easier? ANYONE???

SO I WENT!!!

Okay, so i went to the wedding, and i had a really great time. Sometimes i over analyze things and just need to take my own advise and live my life without worrying about others...and by others i mean THE BLOB!!!!

The music was great, i happened to know the DJ from some years back. The food was awesome and the band was okay, i danced i eat and i laughed it was a great wedding

Did i mention that the BRIDE & GROOM looked amazing!!!

BEST WISHES TO ANNA AND IVAN....CONGRATS!!!

Not going...

Its my boyfriends cousins wedding today his whole family is going to be there...okay so what is so bad about that you ask yourself??? well I can not stand his brother who coincidentally makes my life a living hell!!!! i don't like to think people can just do that to me but ordinarily no one can make me feel this way, who can make me hate so much...but you have to see this living form of blob the way he acts..now he lives with his parents and hes like 24yrs. old his girlfriend lives with him and their daughter as well, so does that give him the right to judge me? NO! and my boyfriend and I (his brother) live on our own with our one child and are doing the damn thang!!!

Now this blob i mentioned earlier(my boyfriends brother) has his mother so damn whipped that i cant be in her house when hes there. If i come to the front door she will block the entree way so that i wont come into the house, can you believe that he doesn't pay rent he doesn't have a job but he runs that house like its his and because he doesn't want me in the house my in laws wont let me in! Now i can come in the house when he isn't there but there on there tipy toes scared he might come home while I'm in the house!

Let me tell you, its happened once I was outside on the lawn because that's as far as i can get to being in there house when THE BLOB is there. So I'm stand out side with my son and my friends son who i was babysitting they were both 1 1/2 at the time, so he comes out the house because hes leaving to go somewhere and while hes getting in his car with his live in girlfriend now Mind you shes 15 at the time and hes 23!! yeah i know!!! so while hes getting in his car he whispers some obscene comments and plops down in the driver seat. I just ignore him because he does not deserve my attention. So since he has left the house it is now okay for me to come in..so i do i take my son and his little buddy into the house. Where there not 15Min's. and he comes back so they get all scared and i tell my boyfriend what can he possibly do?? I spoke to soon..

He comes in passes us and goes to his room, then comes out and says

"how dare you come in my house"
I thought this was funny because it wasn't his house!!
Then out of no where this 300 lbs blob SPITS ON ME!!! yes readers he spits in my face and it was all in my nose,and it smelled like straight shit!!
Now this is happening in just seconds...so my boyfriend jumps in front of him and they start to fight..so what do i do i got to the kitchen and find me a cast iron pan!! that's right i did..
so i go and start trying to get in some hits on his fat ass...later my story went from that to i was trying to brake up the fight, but we all knew my intentions..lol and it was to crack his head open it was possible..and I'm sure it was if i tried hard enough.
So to shorten up the story the police were called and told his parents why are you letting him run your house he is going to run off your son and his girlfriend and you wont see your grandson anymore and the officer told her is that what you want??? she didn't answer because she didn't have an answer...and I've been telling her all along why are you letting him run your life?
Well after the fight things just got worse and worse..no more fights but lies from his brother about me that are so ridiculous that I laugh...and for his 16 year old girlfriend who think shes the shit while shes living with her in laws and trust she has another thing coming because she will be there for a very long time, the blob is not moving out anytime soon. Now shes 16 with no kind of education because he doesn't let her have one and with child, she thinks she has it better then me..ooh no hunny you get a welfare check each month and you buy name brand purses with that money doesn't make you better then me not by the least!!!!

Now about this wedding that takes place today that my boyfriend wants to go to as a family i just cant get the nerve to go to something that i know i wont have a good time and people will act as if nothings ever happened, I'm this outcast, i will not stand for that!! or for anyone to think that they have some control over me so no i will not be going to this wedding I'd rather peel at my own skin before i have to sit at a table next to that imbolsole!!!..lol

learn from others mistakes becuse life is to short to make them all your self..

I SECOND-GUESS MYSELF...I WONDER IF I'M DOING THE RIGHT THINGS. I'M IN MY EARLY TWENTIES, I FEEL TOO YOUNG TO KNOW WHATS REALLY GOOD FOR ME AND TOO OLD TO MAKE CRITICAL MISTAKES. THIS IS THE LIFE I DIDN'T PICTURE MYSELF IN...BUT AS I'M HERE, ITS MINE, I AM UNCOMFORTABLE IN IT AT TIMES.
I AM SO AFRAID OF GOING BACKWARD THAT I AM EVER VIGILANT AND HYPERSENSITIVE TO ALL THAT GOES ON AROUND ME. I WANT TO BE SURE TO MAKE THE RIGHT DECISIONS AS I GO FORWARD, BUT KNOWING THAT I AM HUMAN SCARES ME. IT MEANS THAT I AM VULNERABLE AND PRONE TO MISTAKES AND EVEN PERSONAL DISASTER.
THAT'S WHAT LIFE IS ABOUT, TRYING TO FIND OUT WHO YOU ARE AND KNOW THAT, THAT IS THE PERSON YOU REALLY WANT TO BE! I GUESS WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS I'M IN THE PROSES OF FINDING WHO I AM AND WHERE I WANT TO BE. ALL I THOUGHT WAS PERFECT IN THE WORLD HAS SLOWLY SHATTERED AND HAS CRUMBLED RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! I'M TRYING ALL THESE NEW THINGS IN LIFE AND YET I THOUGHT IT WOULD OF BROKEN ME DOWN SOME HOW ITS MADE ME STRONGER.
AS I'M IN THIS PROSES OF FINDING MYSELF..WHAT EVER THAT MEANS...I CANT HELP TO THINK I'M GOING IN THE WRONG DIRECTION. THIS YEAR SEEMS TO BE SO MUCH MORE THEN ANY OTHER...SO MANY NEW PEOPLE AND SO MANY NEW THINGS...
AS I END THIS...WHATEVER YOU WANT TO CALL IT...I WANT TO THANK THE PEOPLE WHO'S BEEN THERE FOR ME...TO LISTEN TO ME AND OFFER A HAND OUT...THANKS

my first blog..

Thought I'd start off by saying that this is my first blog, and that i love to write now i might not be the best writer and you might not agree with my point of view but i like to get things out and share with the world how i see things.
I also would like to share a lil about myself, i know it is uncommon for blogger to share personals about themselves but i don't think you can get a real good sense of where there coming from unless you know what kind of person they are and there place in life. I am a 21 year old female with child and boyfriend i do wish to be married so badly that i can picture my entire wedding whenever i close my eyes, okay i think its happing again..lol back at the topic at hand. I don't work but i have worked since i was in high school i am a high school graduate i am attending college not a 4yr but who is to judge where i get my education from. My boyfriend has an incredible job that he loves so much he comes home and tries to explain what his day was like i try and act as if I'm interested or even care..no wait that sounds mean i do care its just i don't get what he does so its hard for me to take interest but i do listen and ask questions. He is a great man also 21, we've gone from homeless to hotels to apartments and we've maneged to make it work and this summer were moving into our first house not ours but were going to rent it, you know who knows what will happen down the line and that's the best part of life the sapence the wait the unknown. That's the part that i love!
I think i let the blog world know me i hope you like it and i hope people read it. thank you and i will be getting the hang of this and writing as often as i can. have a really good Friday and enjoy the weekend i know i will!

bye